The dating world can be a whirlwind of emotions, broken hearts, and sometimes, wasted time. Dating was so different when I was younger, and it seemed to be way less stressful. These days it feels like we don’t have conversations anymore; we text instead. Boy, dare we be brave over a text?
In my experience, finding the right relationship takes time, and you are going to ‘kiss a few frogs’ before you find your person, and that’s okay as it’s part of the process. When I met my husband, it took me about six months before I realized that I was in the right relationship (at last).
How do you know for sure that you’re in the right relationship?
I’ve got 13 unmistakable signs that you should watch out for, but first, let’s take a look at how the right relationship should feel.
What Does the Right Relationship Feel Like?
Being in the right relationship makes you excited to see your person when you get home, and they are the first person you want to share the happenings of your day with.
You don’t feel the need to always be dressed in your best and look flawless 24/7. You are comfortable in your own skin around your partner. You communicate without words and give each other a safe and comfortable space without feeling that your relationship is threatened.
You encourage and support each other, 100% all the way. There’s no space for envy or harsh criticism.
According to my hubby, it feels like running a race; it’s hard work but so worth it when you cross the finish line.
I’d say that the right relationship is kinda like a rollercoaster ride; there are ups and downs, but it’s one heck of an exciting ride, and you just need to hold on tight.
13 Signs You Are in the Right Relationship
Knowing you are in the right relationship changes everything. You no longer feel that you have to go over and above to win your partner’s affections – you still put in the work to make them feel loved and valued and appreciated but you don’t have to prove it. You fall into a space where you are comfortable with one another and each other’s quirks.
If you have been in the dating game for a while, and are wondering if you are finally in the right relationship, then these 13 signs will help you figure that out.
These signs are what helped my husband and I finally take that leap of faith, and we have been happily married for over 2 decades now.
I look forward to our many adventures together.
1. You Are the Best Version of Yourself
In most of my past relationships, I found that my partner brought out the worst in me. Whether it was clinginess because they were hardly around or jealousy (because I was insecure), it would get the better of me and I became a horrible person to be around.
When you meet the right person, an obvious sign is that they bring out the best version of you, and you like who you are when you are with them.
2. The Chemistry Is Electric
A subtle sign that the chemistry with your partner is on point is when strangers pick up on it just by looking at your body language and the way you interact as a couple.
Sexual chemistry is also a key sign in knowing that you are in the right relationship. You should get electric shocks and butterflies when your partner touches you or looks at you in a certain way, and vice versa.
3. You Are Vulnerable and Comfy at the Same Time
Opening up to someone can be very hard, but being vulnerable is sometimes even harder, especially in today’s world, where being vulnerable is seen as a weakness.
Being vulnerable is letting go of your defenses and showing your partner your softer side. If you are comfortable doing this and creating that beautiful connection, you are definitely in the right relationship.
4. They Accept You for Who You are
In the right relationship, there will be no need for you to hide behind a mask and pretend to be something that you aren’t. You should be able to be your unabashed self with no regrets.
This was always a red flag in my previous relationships; I always seemed to be living this fake life because my partner was unhappy with my religious or personal life choices (among other things). Feeling accepted by your partner is one of the most essential qualities in a relationship.
5. They Always Have Your Back
Your partner should always have your back and be your go-to person. When your world is thrown into chaos, and you can’t seem to see a way through, it’s good to have a partner who is the calm in the storm.
No matter what the situation is, they know when you just need to vent, when you need advice, or when you need a shoulder to cry on.
6. Your Opinion Is Valued
A relationship is built on respect, trust, and love (this is obvious), but another essential ingredient is that both of your opinions are (and should be) equally valued.
Talking from experience, most couples fall into the bad habit of belittling one another in front of others or in private when they voice their opinions. Doing this is toxic, and the relationship usually doesn’t last. You want to know that your opinion matters in your relationship.
7. It’s Safe to Agree to Disagree
Relationships are all about compromise, and you should feel confident and safe enough to get into a disagreement with your partner and know that it won’t become vicious or vindictive.
We are only human, and arguing is kinda part of the package. As long as you come out of the disagreement stronger, wiser, and more considerate of your partner’s opinions and boundaries (and vice versa), you are in the right relationship.
8. The Past Is Behind You
We are a curious species, and from my experience, we sometimes just don’t get the hint to leave things alone. Is it really the best idea to dig into one another’s past and open old wounds?
Rehashing the past will only bring tension into your relationship. If I can offer any advice, live in the here and the now. Be present in every little moment, and leave the past where it belongs: behind you.
9. No Need to Play Mind Games
When you start dating, there is something about trying to figure out your partner. It can be quite a rush playing mind games with them, but this can also be a bad idea.
When you find yourself in the right relationship (and the chase is over), you won’t be as interested in playing mind games anymore because you are comfortable in your relationship. You can get the answers you need and want by openly asking.
10. There Is Absolute Trust
I have been in toxic relationships where my trust was broken, and honestly, it really sucked. You don’t want to second guess your partner all the time – which can lead to unnecessary poking around your partner’s phone.
If you find yourself in a space where you don’t feel the need to sneak through your partner’s social media or phone, then you have reached a great level in your relationship as there is solid trust between the two of you.
11. You Are In-Like With Them
Love is in the air! Yes, I am guilty of falling head over heels in love with the person I am with, and that’s all fair and well, but the bigger (more important) question is: Do you like the person you are with?
It’s so important to like the person you are with. If you didn’t like them, then how could you possibly love them? Your partner should also be your best friend.
On the other hand, while it’s good (and preferable) to like your partner, sometimes you don’t because they do or say things that might upset you – but you can still love them, be there for them, and accept them.
12. Actions Speak Louder Than Words
It’s so easy to say you’ll do something and then not follow through on your words. This is a big problem in many relationships today. Empty promises lead to distrust and irritation and can cause a rift in your relationship.
Finding a partner that follows through on their words (#integrity) is an unmistakable sign that you are in the right relationship.
13. You Have Shared Adventures
While it’s healthy to have your own hobbies and interests, sharing common interests and adventures with your partner is essential.
Being able to book holidays away and planning activity-packed getaways that you will both enjoy without any arguments because of different interests is a clear indication that you are in the right relationship.
Last Thoughts on Being in the Right Relationship
At the end of the day, when the right relationship finally comes along, you will just know, and you will finally realize what you don’t want in a relationship.
After many years of on and off dating with different people, I finally learned to recognize these unmistakable signs, and I can now happily say that I am in the right relationship.